I see it every day. I do it every day. I scroll through Instagram and Facebook, looking at other businesses that seem to be thriving. The perfectly curated photos of bustling restaurants, packed events, and sold-out products. The confident entrepreneurs sharing their latest wins, their growing teams, and their newest locations.
Then, there’s me—sitting in the back office of one of our businesses, trying to remember if I ate lunch, if payroll went through, and if I ever responded to that email I flagged three days ago.
The lies creep in before I even realize they’re there:
“Everyone else is more successful than me.”
“They’ve figured it out, and I’m just winging it.”
“I’m the only one who feels like they have no idea what they’re doing.”
These lies aren’t new. I’ve been co-owner of The Union Tavern with my husband, Don, and co-founder of BOSSY with Kelly Metras long enough to know that entrepreneurship is a rollercoaster. We’ve built, we’ve pivoted, we’ve survived a pandemic. And yet, those doubts still find a way in.
Social media is a highlight reel.
Yet we compare it to our behind-the-scenes reality. We see the success, but we don’t see the sleepless nights, the failed experiments, the moments of sheer panic. I’ve posted pictures of a beautifully set event space while silently freaking out about a last-minute cancellation call that just came in. I’ve shared wins for BOSSY while wondering how I will fit another thing into my already-packed schedule.
The truth is, the people I compare myself to are likely feeling the exact same way.
We don’t talk enough about the realities behind those perfect images. The restaurant owner who looks like they’re killing it may be struggling to make payroll that week. The boutique owner with the viral post may be buried in returns and chargebacks. The business with the seemingly endless customer engagement may have had to let go of half their staff to survive. None of us have it all together, no matter how it looks online.
Another lie? That successful business owners always know what they’re doing. Let me tell you: I have Googled/YouTubed “how to do ___” more times than I can count. Running a business means constantly learning, constantly adjusting, and sometimes just making the best decision you can with the information you have. We weren’t handed a playbook when we opened Marshall Street. No one had a model for a business owner's support group. There was no step-by-step guide for running a business through a global pandemic. And yet, here we are.
I’ve second-guessed myself more times than I can count.
Should we expand? Should we cut back? Should we take out another loan? Should we call it a day? Every decision feels like it carries the weight of our future, and sometimes it’s paralyzing. But the truth is, no business owner knows everything. We’re all making the best choices we can with the resources we have at the moment.
One of the hardest lies to shake is that no one else feels the same fears. I talk to business owners all the time who say, “I thought it was just me.” The self-doubt, the exhaustion, the pressure to be everything to everyone—it’s not just you. It’s not just me. It’s all of us. It’s why BOSSY exists. It’s why we have to keep talking about the real struggles, not just the wins.
The reality is that running a business can be incredibly isolating.
The weight of responsibility is heavy, and often, we don’t have the luxury of showing vulnerability. Employees look to us for stability. Customers expect consistency. We carry the pressure of keeping everything running, even on days when we feel like falling apart. And that loneliness - it’s exhausting. But it’s also why finding a community, whether it’s fellow business owners, support groups, or just people who truly understand, is so important.
None of us should have to navigate this alone.
Here is the TRUTH we need to remember:
Owning a business is hard. It’s messy and unpredictable, and some days, it feels impossible. But success isn’t about perfection—it’s about persistence. It’s about showing up, even when we feel like we’re failing. It’s about remembering that every business owner has struggled, that social media isn’t the whole story, and that we are more capable than we give ourselves credit for.
I remind myself daily that my journey isn’t meant to look like anyone else’s. The struggles, the setbacks, and even the failures—they’re all part of what makes us stronger. And when I take a step back and REALLY look, I realize that our businesses, our teams, and the life we’ve built are proof that I am enough.
So the next time you catch yourself believing the lies, take a breath. Look at how far you’ve come.
And remember—you’re not alone in this.
Kelly Bush, Small Business Owner and Co-Founder of BOSSY Roc
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